there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Randomize
