he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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