Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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