maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
What changed your mind?
Being sober
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
