I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
