Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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