I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
