No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
His nipple licking is glorious
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