You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Porn is love you can see.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
