was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize