I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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