I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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