This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
