do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
