I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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