roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize