Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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