Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
