super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
