Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
