I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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