i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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