I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize