Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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