Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
