Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
