i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Randomize