Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
