3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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