so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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