The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
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