i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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