I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
