just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
