tonight lets celebrate not being married
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
