Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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