I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
