I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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