i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
only you would photoshop your dick
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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