i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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