Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize