let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
