If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Sex in the backyard? Check.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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