Where did you get a picture of my penis
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
we're so committed to being not committed
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
