Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
