Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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