just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
