My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
