the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
