He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
