**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
